DEAR DEIDRE: RATHER than lose my girlfriend I agreed to an open relationship.

So she sleeps with other men, but now that I’ve fallen for my boss my girlfriend is furious.

I’m 35 and a male executive assistant and my girlfriend is 29.

She’s a nurse and has a constant parade of male attention.

When we got together two years ago, it quickly became apparent that she had a very high sex drive.

Even then I wondered how on earth I would keep up.

So when she told me she wanted an open relationship — only for romps — I agreed to give it a try.

My mates think I’m mad for not taking advantage of the arrangement but I haven’t had so much as a one-night stand. It isn’t my style.

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We don’t ever go into details but I think my girlfriend has slept with three or four other men.

It’s OK as it’s only about sex so I’ve never felt threatened. However, my new job has thrown a spanner in the works.

I’ve fallen for my boss, 34, and I’m not sure I can resist her for much longer.

She’s the head of marketing for a big travel company and we’re working away in Las Vegas soon.

Last week she spilled coffee down her blouse and so I grabbed a cloth and handed it to her but she asked me to mop it up.

It was the most erotic moment of my life.

Somehow I managed to control myself but seriously doubt I’ll be able to resist her while we’re away.

I’m so angry with myself because my feelings are getting deeper.

My girlfriend knows there’s something wrong and is getting stroppy.

I’m drinking too much. I’m a mess.



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DEIDRE SAYS:  Your feelings are so intense but do try and slow down.

It would be a shame to ruin your opportunities in your new role.

While you allowed your girlfriend an open relationship, this was a compromise for you, a way to ensure you could hold on to her.

Now your head has been turned and your emotions are coming into play, it shows that your own relationship isn’t entirely happy.

Before you embark on any new liaison, it would be best to work out whether your relationship and even open relationship has run its course.

A counsellor would help you to work this through.

My support pack How Counselling Can Help explains more.

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