DEAR DEIDRE: LATELY, my girlfriend’s flirty behaviour has really started to bother me. It makes me question our future.
We have been together for seven years, and she has always been a flirt.
She loves getting attention and enjoys making other people feel good.
If we go out with male friends, she’ll giggle a lot and touch their arms, or put her head on their shoulders.
The more she drinks, the more she does it.
I used to put it down to her being younger than me, but she is 24 now, so I think this is just her character.
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I’m 28 and have told her I don’t like it. She says she doesn’t want to hurt me and she will try to stop but then she does it again.
I don’t think she would cheat on me but I have started feeling very insecure, particularly when she goes out without me.
If she acts like this in front of me, what does she get up to when I’m not there?
I love her and we have a fantastic relationship otherwise, but I don’t think I can cope with much more of this. Maybe we’re just not suited?
DEIDRE SAYS: Some people are natural flirts and genuinely mean nothing by it.
But if your girlfriend’s behaviour is hurting you, then she needs to take your feelings into account and try to tone it down.
Talk to her again and explain that your relationship is now at risk. Make her think about how she would feel if you were doing the same with other women.
Maybe she isn’t very confident and does this to get a response so she feels attractive. Reassure her how much you love and desire her.
She may also want to think about cutting down on drinking. My support pack Looking After Your Relationship could be helpful here.
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