DEAR DEIDRE: MY husband is a stickler for order and it’s beginning to put my adult son off visiting.

He recently blew up after my son had a bath and didn’t leave the tub completely spotless. My husband started shouting that he was disgusting because there were a couple of hairs left in it.

My son is 37 and pretty tidy but he’s not a cleaning obsessive like my husband.

Unfortunately he heard his dad and left early with his wife and our two-year-old grandson.

I’m 62 and my husband is a retired Army officer aged 64.

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He is now a house husband and does most of the housework, maintenance, cooking and cleaning.

I told him he wasn’t being reasonable but he insists he is entitled to his opinion and believes he is right. I said he could alienate our son and cause bad feeling, but he just walked away.

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DEIDRE SAYS: Your husband is more than a bit of a perfectionist and his Army background means he also has high standards.

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Along with this comes his view that things should be done a certain way. He expects the same high standards from his family.

Ask him to consider what is more important: a couple of hairs in the bathtub or a good relationship with your son, daughter-in-law and grandson?

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