A 35-year-old aunt struggling to conceive, a high schooler getting pressured by their grandma to become a surrogate and a teen mom seeing her own cycle repeated … this story set the internet ablaze.
A mom has received overwhelming support after taking to the internet for advice following a dustup with her mother-in-law.
The tale, shared to an anonymous forum, includes two teen pregnancies, a couple struggling with infertility and secret conversation that resulted in major family drama.
Thousands of Redditors were compelled to share advice as OP struggled to navigate the complex familial dynamics.
Read on to see the whole story for yourself.
Grandma Who Only Buys Gifts for Bio-Grandkid and Leaves Step-Granddaughter In The Cold Sparks Brutal Debate
AITA for kicking my MIL out of my house for trying to convince my daughter to give her baby to my SIL?
The original poster (OP) first introduced herself as a 34-year-old female, who has been married for 10 years.
“We have 2 daughters together 7 and 5,” she explained of her marriage to her husband. “I have a daughter from a high school relationship who is 17.”
OP then revealed her teenage daughter is “7 months pregnant.” She went on to describe the situation, “The father is in her life. They both are working hard saving money. I’ve already had the necessary talks with my daughter, but she is dead set on being a mother to this child.”
The woman then shared how her in-laws became involved in her daughter’s pregnancy, first detailing how her sister-in-law is 35 and “has struggled with fertility, and basically has been told she cannot have children.”
“They’ve been actively trying or just not using protection for the past 10 years, and only conceived twice ending in early miscarriages,” she continued.
I simply opened the door and just said ‘get out.’
Then came the big reveal: “My [mother-in-law] already brought up the idea of letting [my sister-in-law] adopt this baby.” OP explains in the post that she and her husband told his family that her daughter is intent on keeping the child.
“The other day I came home from work and my [mother-in-law] was over, and I overheard her talking to my daughter about that idea. Telling her how she wouldn’t be fit to be a mother and [her aunt] is much more prepared and how she wouldn’t want to repeat the cycle ([because] I had her so young),” OP recounted.
“She then pulled a guilt trip and told her how [her aunt’s] dream is for a child. I simply opened the door and just said ‘get out.’ She stared at me in complete disbelief, then said I couldn’t kick her out of her son’s house,” OP wrote. “I said, I can and I just did. She left, but then when my husband got home from work he said she had left a ton of messages about how in the wrong I am and how I’m setting my daughter up for failure.”
“My husband’s on my side,” OP said, before asking, “AITA [am I the a–hole]?”
Mother-in-Law Demands to FaceTime During Labor & Delivery, Fight with Daughter Ensues
The Reddit Community Reacts
Bodily autonomy ultimately ruled the day, and the subreddit, when it came to this story.
Pretty much unanimously the post was branded NTA (not the a–hole) as Redditors weighed in with advice and support.
“While I cannot imagine the tough journey your SIL is on as she navigates her fertility struggles, your daughter’s circumstance is not a patch job for your SIL’s situation,” one commenter noted. “There are tough conversations to be had when one is pregnant without planning it (regardless of age), but it was not your MIL’s place to have any of those conversations and she didn’t even approach it as a conversation: she was trying to manipulate your daughter emotionally.”
Even if your daughter eventually decides that teenage motherhood is not for her, she is not a broodmare for your in-laws.
The Redditor then added,” She deserved to get kicked out. She has no respect for boundaries or decency,” before advising: “Food for thought: Could you (or husband) touch base with SIL to see if she knew what MIL was doing? I hope she was unawares, but if she was not, it may necessitate a conversation with both MIL and SIL about boundaries and what is and is not their place in regards to your daughter’s pregnancy (although I also encourage you to check with your daughter to see if she is willing, and comfortable, to have you advocate on her behalf this way).”
While another wrote, “I will NEVER understand this attitude. Hubby and I spent 20 years trying to have a baby. Even after a miscarriage that nearly killed me. I would never, in a million years, try to convince someone to give up their child. It’s horrendous and she deserves for you to go full no contact until she apologizes.”
“[For what it’s worth], two of my cousins had babies at 16 and 17. They both have master’s degrees and happy lives. One is married with 3 more kids, one has never married but isn’t lonely or unhappy.* Their children are also successful. Your daughter can do this, and you know how to help. That’s the majority of what she needs. I hope her baby is a blessing to you all.”
In a more vulgar but to the point comment, one Redditor summarized: “Even if your daughter eventually decides that teenage motherhood is not for her, she is not a broodmare for your in-laws. Letting a close family member adopt the baby is a horrible idea put forth by horribly selfish people. Good on you and your husband to have your daughter’s back.”
What do you think?
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