DEAR DEIDRE: I’M stuck in the middle of an awful family rift and don’t know what to do.

My husband has got the hump with his son because he had a third child. I’m 65 and he’s 67.

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His issue is they hardly had enough money to provide for the first two children and they weren’t exactly the best parents either.

They were always putting themselves first rather than the children.

My husband is so angry and hates his son’s girlfriend. Now he won’t make any effort with them.

The good news is they are stepping up with their third child and she is turning into a gorgeous little girl. But he refuses to hear it.

I want him to have an honest chat with his son, otherwise I can’t see a way out of this situation.

DEIDRE SAYS: Talking honestly in this case could make matters a lot worse.

Your husband would do better to offload his frustrations to a counsellor.

He can contact the BACP – British Association for Counselling and Psychotherapy, (, 01455 883300) for reputable counsellors.

While your husband’s concerns are valid, his current behaviour won’t help anyone.

He must accept that while he can’t stand his son’s partner, she is the mum of his grandchildren.

For the family’s sake he needs to bite his tongue and make an effort or he’ll hardly see them.

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