Gwyneth Paltrow is reflecting on her divorce from her ex husband Chris Martin.

“I’ve learned so much from something I wanted least in the world,” she began.

“I never wanted to get divorced,” the 48-year-old Oscar winner said on the Anna Faris is Unqualified podcast. “I never wanted to not be married to the father of my kids, theoretically. But I have learned more about myself through that process than I could have imagined. And because I focused on accountability, I was then able to find the most amazing man and build something that I’ve never had before with Brad [Falchuk], my husband.”

Chris and Gwyneth share two kids: daughter Apple, 16, and son, Moses, 14. Gwyneth and Brad married in 2018.

About her relationship with her husband, she said, “We were friends first for a long time and once I was like, ‘Are we going to date? Is this happening?’ I was scared because he is a person who demands presence and intimacy and communication in a way that I just didn’t know how to [do].”

“I like to fight by shutting down… I leave the room. And he’s like, ‘No,’ he’s like, ‘Absolutely not. We are sitting down and we are figuring this out.’ And he demands that I am honest with myself in a way that is hard for me but which really helps me grow,” she said. “I think I recognized his amazing qualities,” adding, “It was like being with some kind of jiu-jitsu master where they’re like, ‘I’m going to make you see your own stuff so you can win and advance.’”

Gwyneth previously revealed what led to her and Chris‘ divorce.

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