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Interview Magazine did a piece with Christopher Meloni and it’s one big thirst-trap. I love it! I love that a 60-year-old man best known for playing an angry cop on episodic network television is still the focus of so much heat. It helps that Meloni has always handled his fame lightly, and he finds the public’s thirst for his thiccness pretty funny. Anyway, it’s worth going to Interview just to see the photos of Meloni because holy sh-t is he a hot piece. Some highlights from the interview:

His famous butt: “This is what has happened. I’ve been blessed with glutes that have an attractive shape. But I have a trainer, and we’re going through bodybuilding phases, and where everyone kind of caught me was that I’d been preparing for one year in a very high-intensity weight training program that actually focused on legs. So I guess you could argue that the glute-peeping public are now reaping the benefits of all that hard work.”

He’s kind of gluten free: “I’m semi gluten free. I think that falls under the category of vegan, which I’m dipping my toes into. I’m unafraid to expand the horizons and see how it makes me feel. I actually had a gluten-free pasta just the other night that shocked and pleased me. It’s a close cousin to the Beyond Meat–type stuff, and I’m a big fan of those as a change of pace.”

Shipping: “Meaning that if you’re an Elliot and Olivia shipper, you’re thirsting to see their relationship be consummated? That’s like asking me to try to stop the northbound train by lying down on the track. That’s a third-rail question.”

He was a high-school quarterback: “It was awesome being one. You’re basically number one on the call sheet. The younger kids were in awe of you, but I’m not designed to buy into the hype. I just wanted to win, which we did. The fact that we were undefeated was the true goal.”

He’s not into celebrity trainers: “I’m not against them, but it just doesn’t fit with who I am. I like things in my life a little low-key, especially if it’s less expensive.”

His time on Celebrity Jeopardy: “I did it twice. One time it was a Law & Order–themed thing, and [the actors] Katie Erbe and Sam Waterston thought I was playing possum because I was horrible in the warmup round. And then when it was time to really play and Alex Trebek came out, I kicked their ass. It felt good.”

On cops: “I don’t want to get too heavy, but my relationship with cops is great, and there’s no higher compliment than when a cop comes up to me and gives me props.”

On being called a “zaddy”: “I’ve been called that a lot, and who am I to argue with it? Sure, I’m a zaddy.”

[From Interview Magazine]

He is a zaddy and he owns that! As for the thing about cops… yeah, even Ice-T has said similar things, that he went from “Cop Killer” to cops stopping him in the streets of New York to tell him how much they love him on Law & Order: SVU. Cops really like copaganda, as it turns out, and cops love actors who play them on cop shows. As for his famous ass… like, Meloni has always been known for his body (among other things). The kids don’t know about Oz and all of that. But basically, everyone from the early 1990s until now has known that Meloni has a great body and a great ass.


— peter hess (@PeterNHess) April 7, 2021

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Photos courtesy of Interview Magazine’s Instagram.

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