My boyfriend had sex with his dying female friend as a ‘final wish’ – am I wrong for being mad?

• Girlfriend found out her boyfriend slept with dying female friend 
• The 22-year-old is filled with jealousy and guilt as the friend has died 
• The boyfriend regrets what he did and admits he’s in the wrong 
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A girlfriend has been left ‘distraught and jealous’ after finding out her boyfriend of three years slept with his terminally ill female friend as a ‘final wish’. 

The 22-year-old woman claims a mutual friend spoke of her partner’s infidelity while on a group holiday and she’s since been struggling emotionally – especially because the friend passed away in March 2022.

Detailing the situation on Reddit, the woman sought relationship advice and said her boyfriend has down following the death of his friend. 

‘I hate myself because I get angry inside whenever he mentions her. I can’t express my jealousy because she’s dead anyway,’ she wrote. 

‘This jealousy is eating me up. They totally had emotional sex because of her condition. I don’t even know who initiated it. It was probably something like how she didn’t want to die a virgin.’ 

Hundreds offered words of advice, most of whom agreed there’s ‘no excuses’ for cheating on a partner.

A young woman, 22, found out her boyfriend cheated on her with his terminally ill friend. She’s been jealous ever since and is considering breaking up with him. The friend passed away last year (stock image)

‘My boyfriend didn’t tell me that he had sex with his dying friend. We were together when it happened. He’s still depressed about her death. I feel jealous and I don’t know what to do,’ she began. 

‘I’m confident that he was never attracted to her. They never had a relationship beyond that. She did have a secret crush on him though. She was the little sister of their friend group. This incident happened late November or December 2021.

‘My boyfriend and I had never even had sex all the way then. To clarify, he didn’t lose his virginity to her but she did lose her virginity to him.’ 

She described their relationship as ‘otherwise perfect’ and he has always been a ‘good boyfriend’ even at his lowest points. 

‘We were also best friends before we ended up together. I think it’s unfair to be so black and white about this,’ she added.

After reading the comments from other Redditors, the girlfriend confronted her boyfriend about his infidelity and shared a detailed update.

She said her boyfriend didn’t say anything because he didn’t want to breakup and now ‘disapproves’ of his own actions. 

‘He didn’t want to hurt me (but he did anyway because he didn’t talk until now). The guilt is part of why his mental health is awful,’ she said. 

‘My boyfriend said that if he could, he would’ve asked me for permission then. He would have respected my decision and wouldn’t have done it. Though a part of him would also feel guilty about not fulfilling his friend’s wish when she dies.

The boyfriend also admitted that he only slept with his friend ‘because she was dying’ and claims she made the first move. 

‘He wouldn’t have done it in other circumstances. It wasn’t romantic for him,’ she continued.

‘It was spur of the moment because of strong emotions. He didn’t get to ask me for permission because it happened exactly at that moment.’ 

‘My boyfriend didn’t tell me that he had sex with his dying friend. We were together when it happened. He’s still depressed about her death. I feel jealous and I don’t know what to do,’ she began (stock image)

‘I think it’s so messed up that sleeping with him specifically was one of the dying girl’s dreams. Maybe she just didn’t care anymore because she was going to leave us anyway. I’m still conflicted,’ the girlfriend wrote. 

After hearing his side, she’s still considering whether or not she should end their relationship. 

Hundreds of people took to the comments to share their thoughts on the matter – most of which criticised the boyfriend.  

‘Dude what? I would do a lot of things for a dying friend’s last request but disrespecting my relationship and cheating to give them one last thrill is out of the question,’ one wrote. 

Read more: I’ve been with my boyfriend for six years – these are my 10 ‘controversial’ relationship rules that have kept us together

Gia Aldisert, 21, (pictured) and her boyfriend, 22, of six years have a set list of rules they stick by in their relationship. Some called the rules ‘sensible’ while others dubbed it as ‘controlling’

‘A friend who would ask this of someone as their last wish, is a s*** friend,’ another said. 

‘Yeah he would’ve respected your wishes if he could’ve asked you… that’s why he didn’t, right?’ a third added. 

Someone else said: ‘I don’t think he’s as innocent as you’re attempting to brainwash yourself into thinking. He had an opportunity, took it, then regretted it, as most cheaters do.’ 

Read more: My husband ruined our gender reveal and I acted like a brat and ‘raged’ in front of everyone – but here’s why other mums say I’m not to blame 

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