Every relationship has its ups and downs, and as you and your partner grow and experience those ups and downs together, you might find that you’re changing and evolving, too. Being in love is amazing, and being in a supportive relationship can be even better because it can truly set you up to be your best self. If you’re feeling really secure in your relationship, you might notice a few amazing new things about yourself. You were amazing before you got into your relationship, but being someone’s partner can affect your moods, your emotions, and your actions in really positive ways.
Of course, relationship rough patches can negatively affect your heart and mind, but when you’re standing on solid ground in your relationship, you’re probably feeling pretty secure about other areas of your life, too. A lot of being a good, supportive partner is paying attention to your SO’s emotions and needs, and being available to them when they need you. But maintaining your own identity and independence can make a partnership even stronger, so it’s good to be mindful and aware of not only how your relationship is affecting your partner, but how it’s affecting you. I spoke to Tyler Turk, CEO and Founder of Crafted With Love, about three things you might notice about yourself if you’re in a relationship that has you feeling secure.
You’re Less Anxious
You might be really anxious about the state of the world, but if you’re in a great place in your relationship, you’re probably not anxious about your honey. A lot of aspects of dating can be anxiety-inducing — braving the first few dates, figuring out when and how to DTR, and even deciding to live together. But once you and your partner get into a routine and a rhythm, you might find yourself much more relaxed in general.
In a secure relationship, Turk says, ‘There will be open and honest communication along with a strong level of trust and understanding." If your relationship is offering you stability, support, and security, you’ll probably be a lot less anxious in general… Even when you read the news.
You Can Be Alone
If you’re solid in your relationship, you don’t need to spend all your waking hours with your SO. You can both do your own thing — have a night out with your friends, or even a night in by yourself without feeling like doing so could jeapordize your relationship. If you’re dealing with feelings of insecurity or jealousy, it might be hard to have your partner tell you they want to go out with their friends without you, or you might find yourself looking for reasons to pick a fight.
Turk says, "In a secure relationship, you focus on the creating a strong bond between you both rather than trying to find flaws." This strong bond creates confidence and security both in yourself and in your relationship. Being able to be on your own and still feel confident about your relationship is a great indication that you’re on solid ground.
You Prioritize Your Friendships
When you’re newly dating someone, it can be really tempting to spend all of your time with them. If you’re putting all of your energy into this new relationship, your other relationships with your friends might be suffering. Once you’re solid in a relationship, you probably feel confident that your partner doesn’t need your entire focus. Turk says, "Within a secure relationship, there will be a healthy amount of time together and time spent for yourself or with friends." At that point, you might find yourself prioritizing your friends and making sure those important relationships are sustained.
If you think your relationship is fabulous and you’re killing it in life and not noticing any of these things in your life, that’s absolutely normal! Every relationship and dynamic is different, and the most important thing is that you feel supported, strong, and loved. Because you deserve all those things and more!
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